No david by david shannon

9.77  ·  3,096 ratings  ·  606 reviews
no david by david shannon

No, David! by David Shannon

Oh yes. Ive read other peoples reviews of this book. I understand that its pure catnip to Jasons, Ethans and Rebeccas throughout the land. But until now, one perspective has been conspicuously absent. So let me try to rectify that.

MY NAME IS DAVID AND I LOATHE THIS BOOK.

Why? Let me count the ways:

1. The books message is uniformly nihilistic throughout. Instead of being taught to embrace life in all its infinite variety, the feral, razor-toothed, wolf-child is subjected to a constant stream of negativity and denial from an obviously sadistic disembodied authority figure.

2. Is it not remarkable that there are no other children evident anywhere in this vicious little vignette of cruelty and persecution? Why is this? Well, obviously because Jason, Ethan, Becky and the gang are all hanging out at Jasons crib, watching Bob the Builder and scarfing down marshmallow n ketchup pizza, because Jasons mom is like totally cool, and a future MILF to boot.

3. And what is it with the kids teeth anyway? Even feral children deserve a little time with the orthodontist. The crude, ugly caricature of a wolf-child that the author presents here is a hideous calumny with the potential to cause severe emotional damage to Davids throughout the land.

4. It is a complete travesty to think that the single instance of faintly nurturing behavior demonstrated by the Eva Braun authority figure (to someone called Davey) could possibly negate the damage inflicted by the litany of negativity and denial that precede it.

The dedication on this woeful screed reads as follows

To Martha, my mother, who kept me in line then,
and to Heidi, my wife, who keeps me in line now.

from which it is obvious that David Shannon is a completely pitiful individual, who has obviously embraced his pathetic, whipped existence.

BUT, FELLOW WARRIOR-DAVIDS, THAT DOESNT MEAN WE HAVE TO. TAKE THE PEANUT BUTTER JAR, SMEAR IT ALL OVER THIS BOOK, AND THEN FEED IT INTO THE VCR.

And dont forget to check the site www.davidsunitedagainstcaregivercruel... regularly to monitor progress of the class action suit.

File Name: no david by david shannon.zip
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Published 15.01.2019

No David The Movie

It was 32 last time and has sunk to
David Shannon

Top 100 Picture Books #88: No, David! by David Shannon

No, David! About a decade ago, he thought he was done, having long moved on to other projects — until the 20th anniversary of the book that launched his career reared its head, and a new idea sprung. Grow Up, David! Anyone who read it with a parent as a kid likely remembers their mom or dad turning emotional at the final pages. Its simplicity has rendered it timeless. I know you wrote it, initially, when you were 5. Now, so many years later, what do you remember about writing it, if anything?

In stock: Usually ships within hours. Your order will ship on or around the release date. Paperback Book 5. This book is perfect for reading aloud. Children will relish the deliciously bad behavior and the warm and cuddly conclusion. Picture Book

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